Google Founder Larry Page Quits Work, Moves To Caribbean Lair So He Can Focus His Time On Flying Cars And Halting The Human Aging Process

Source - Larry Page, who recently turned down an invite to testify on Capitol Hill about foreign actors fomenting dissent on social media platforms, has been seen less and less around the Mountain View, Calif., headquarters of Alphabet, the search giant’s parent company, according to a report on Thursday.

While the company has not disclosed where Page has been, people who know him say he’s been spending more and more time on his own island in the sunny Caribbean Sea, according to Bloomberg, which reported on the tech mogul’s possible whereabouts.

Page, who started Google along with Sergey Brin, has left day-to-day decisions to lieutenants like Google Chief Executive Sundar Pichai, and is described as being “invisible to wide swaths of the company.”

The tech whiz prefers to only take on “rare projects that deeply fascinate him,” such as those executed by Alphabet’s X research lab, which focuses on “moonshot” projects like flying cars and attempts to halt the human aging process.

First of all, if you’re one of the Google employees that’s upset about Larry not showing up to work…you’re an idiot. The guy is worth almost sixty-BILLION dollars, so he can do whatever he wants. You should be grateful he breathes the same air as you. Same goes for anyone involved in the Senate Intelligence hearings. Sorry he doesn’t feel like working a nine-to-five and sitting through a voluntary sixteen-hour government interview. I get why he should sit through the hearings; he controls the flow of like 90% of the world’s information (scary), but he doesn’t have to.  That’s the best part about America.

In fact, Larry’s doing exactly what a guy in his position should be doing, which is absolutely nothing. He just hangs out on his island all day and works on passion projects. His just so happen to be flying cars and figuring out how to halt the human aging process. Weird, but if he has the funds to do it, then why not?

Speaking of islands, look at this fucking thing.

His next door neighbors are Richard Branson and the Caribbean Sea. It’s called Eustatia Island and it’s thirty-acres right in the center of the British Virgin Islands. Not a bad life.

Hopefully he doubles down and stops showing up to work altogether. That’s the whole point of making money in the first place. Whatever the case, don’t let the man get you down, Larry. And I’m sure the Senate hearings will be fine without you. Just make sure to check your mail because chances are you’ll have a summons.